#2: The Greatest Commercial of All Time

This is the greatest commercial of all time.

"Hi, Phil Swift here with Flex Seal!"

I'm serious. No other commercial has embedded itself so thoroughly in our collective psyche - from my perspective as a young person on the internet, at least. It has inspired hundreds of parodies, thousands of posts, and hundreds of thousands of comments. Phil Swift, always excited and eternally grinning, is a veritable deity of internet memes. His immortal words, "That's a lot of damage!" (from a different Flex Seal commercial), are arguably better known than the product itself.

Phil Swift is the CEO and spokesman of Flex Seal Products, which produces the eponymous Flex Seal, the product Phil describes as "liquid rubber in a can!" Backed by optimistic electronic music, this two-minute 2015 infomercial features him fixing pots, sealing leaks, and trying and failing to destroy Flex Seal with a blowtorch and liquid nitrogen. To top it all off, Phil replaces the bottom of a boat with a screen door, fills the screen with Flex Seal, and goes sailing. "Not only does it stay afloat, but the inside is completely dry!" Flex Seal is so good at holding back water, Phil compares it to "the Hoover Dam - in a can!"

Flex Seal is intended for anybody at all who might possibly need to seal a hole. There's no hidden message here - this commercial aims to appeal to viewers through logic, as Phil presents the myriad ways in which Flex Seal can be applied while listing the various qualities of the product: its strength, its convenience, and its versatility. Who wouldn't want to fix their leaks with the one and only Hoover Dam in a can? The way Phil sees it, you can use Flex Seal for just about anything. Near the end, Phil even makes a special offer, an appeal to your purchasing impulses - two cans for only $19.99! (Plus additional processing.)

This might be the most effective commercial I've seen. Thanks to its viral spread, I now know Flex Seal is an option for anything I might need it for, which, apparently, is everything. More importantly, Phil's boundless optimism (not to mention the sheer absurdity of replacing the bottom of a boat with a screen door) makes this infomercial a legend of internet memes and among viral advertising. No commercial, in my opinion, can rival the sheer viral effectiveness of Phil Swift's Flex Seal.

Except this one.

"Hi, Phil Swift here with Flex Tape!"

 Phil Swift is back, and he's using the same tactics. This 2017 commercial, probably more so than the original Flex Seal ad, is what made the legend. Flex Tape has probably been parodied even more than Flex Seal has. And yes, it also involves a boat.

 Flex Tape follows the same formula as Flex Seal while using light rock instead of electronic. Phil showcases Flex Tape by patching holes in tanks ("it even works underwater!"), fixing pipes, re-attaching the fender to a pickup, and famously sawing a boat in half and repairing it, all with Flex Tape. Phil takes obvious pleasure in splitting said boat. "To show you the power of Flex Tape," he proclaims loudly, "I sawed this boat in half!"

 The fact that Phil clearly cares about his product really adds to the effectiveness of the commercial. He is endlessly enthusiastic to share the wonders of Flex Tape with you; he truly seems to believe that it's worth sharing. I think this, and particularly the boat scene, is why Flex Seal's commercials have caught on so well. It's hard to find somebody as excited about a product as Phil Swift is about Flex Tape. It helps that it really is his product; as CEO of the company, much of his excitement is sheer pride. Just looking at the guy can brighten your mood.

 Apart from Phil's pathos, this commercial relies on logic and a steady stream of advantages and uses for the product. "Imagine everything you can do with the power of Flex Tape!" Phil doesn't make you a special offer in this commercial like he does in Flex Seal, but he doesn't need to. By latching onto Flex Tape and spreading it in posts and parodies, the internet has done all of Phil Swift's extra marketing for him.

 Hey, I'd buy it.

Larisa

 More Phil Swift can be found on the Flex Seal YouTube channel.

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